Tag Archives: FedEx

Sep 13 2009
Lost in Translation

FedEx needs a Spell Checker

In the 2nd paragraph they say “we can not quote it’s content to you via email for privacy reasons”, but in the next paragraph they do. Second best quote: “your sender did not leave> us with his phone number because he stated that he just arrived> Nigeria and he hasn’t fix any phone yet”

Dear Customer,

We have been waiting for you to contact us for your Confirmable Package that is registered with us for shipping to your residential location.We had thought that your sender gave you our contact details.

It may interest you to know that a letter is also added to your package.However,we can not quote it’s content to you via email for privacy reasons.

We understand that the content of your package itself is a Bank Draft worth of $800,000.00 USD. As you know, FedEx do not ship money in CASH or in CHEQUES but Bank Drafts are shippable. The package is registered with us for mailing by your colleague as claimed, and your colleague explained that he is from the United States but he is here in Nigeria for a three (3) months Surveying Project as he works with a construction firm in the Nigeria West Africa We are sending you this email because your package is been registered on a Special Order.

What you have to do now, is to contact our Dilivery Department for immediate dispatchment of your package to your residencial address.

Note that as soon as our Delivery Team confirms your informations, it will take only one working day(24 hours)for your package to arrive its designated destination.

For your information, the VAT & Shipping charges as well as Insurance fees have been paid by your colleague before your package was registered.

Note that the payment that is made on the Insurance, Premium & Clearance Certificates, are to certify that the Bank Draft is not a Drug Affiliated Fund (DAF) neither is it funds to sponsor Terrorism in yourcountry. This will help you avoid any form of query from the Monetary Authority of yourcountry.

However, you will have to pay a sum of $205 USD to the FedEx Delivery Department being full payment for the Security Keeping Fee of the FedEx company as stated in our privacy terms & condition page. Also be informed that your colleague wished to pay for the Security Keeping charges, but we do not accept such payment considering the facts that all items & packages that is registered with us have a time limitation and we cannot accept payment having known not when you will be picking up the package or even responding to us.

So we cannot take the risk to have accepted such payment incase of any possible demurrage. Kindly note that your colleague did not leave us with any furtherinformation.

We hope that you respond to us as soon as possible because if you fail to respond until the expiry date of the foremost package, we may refer the package to the Nigeria Commission for Welfare as the package do not have a return address.

Kindly contact the delivery department (FedEx Delivery Post) with the detailsgiven below:

Contact Person:Richard Raynor
Email: rray[Removed]@ymail.com
Tel: +234 803 ### ####

Kindly complete the below form and send it to the email address given above. This is mandatory to reconfirm your Postal address and telephone numbers.

FULL NAMES:
TELEPHONE:
POSTAL ADDRESS:
CITY:
STATE:
COUNTRY:

Kindly complete the above form and summit it to the delivery manager on: As soon as your details are received, ourdelivery team will give you the neccessary payment procedure so that you can effect the payment for the Security Keeping Fees. As soon as they confirm your payment receipt of $205 USD , they will not hesitate to dispatch your package as > well as the attahced letter to your residence.It usually takes 24 hours> being an over night delivery service.

Note that we were not instructed to email you, but due to the high> priority of your package we had to inform you as your sender did not leave> us with his phone number because he stated that he just arrived> Nigeria and he hasn’t fix any phone yet. We indeed personally sealed your Bank Draft and we found youremail contact in the attached letter as the recipient of the> foremost package.> >

Ensure to contact the delivery department with the email address given above and ensure to fill the above form as well to enable a> successful reconfirmation.

Do not reply this email because this email account is not monitored. Send your details to: rray[Removed]@ymail.com

Yours Faithfully,
Mrs. Margaret Blaire.> FedEx Online Team Management.
All rights reserved. © 1995-2009 FedEx.

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Jun 07 2009
Lost in Translation

Carnac the Magnificent

carnacNow working at FedEx Nigeria, Carnac the Magnificent, would not let his psychic abilities go wasted. He first had to seal the bank draft before finding your email address.

Dear Parcel Owner,

We want you to understand that the mail sent to you from this office is authentic and your parcel is presently in our custody.but if you are still in dought please we will have no other chioce than to send your parcel to the nigerian income and revenue tax office and forget completely about this i advise you kindly let us know your response, for this mail was sent from the nigerian fedex office and we have your complete data for delivery that was were we got your name and email but we want you to send your data’s to know if it corresponds with the informations we have.

Note that we were not instructed to email you, but due to the high priority of your package we had to inform you as your sender did not leave us with his telephone number because he stated that he just arrived Nigeria thus has no telephone. We sealed your Bank Draft and found your email contact on the receivers column as the recipient of the foremost package.

Yours Faithfully,
Mr Larry Anderson.
FedEx Online Team Management
Tel:+[Badly formatted fake phone number removed]

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May 23 2009
Lost in Translation

Not a Drug Money

What do you mean I am under arrest, she gave me a certificate guaranteeing it is not a Drug Money or meant to sponsor Terrorist attack?

Greeting !!!

This is to bring to your notice that a bank draft of $1,000,000.00 United States Dollars,have been issued in your favour by the World Bank from a random computer e-mail search. I Mrs. Jenny Brown , a worker in the World Bank have deposited the draft with (UPS EXPRESS, NIGERIA), after many e-mails to you which you have not replied.I have travelled out of Nigeria now, I do hope that you will receive this mail and act fast.What you have to do now is to contact the UPS EXPRESS, NIGERIA as soon as possible to know when they will deliver the package to you because of the expiring date. For your information,I have paid for the delivering Charge,Insurance premium and Clearance Certificate Fee of the Cheque showing that it is not a Drug Money or meant to sponsor Terrorist attack in your Country.You are advice to contact the courier services immediately Again, I would have paid for the Security Keeping fee but they refused because they said they don’t know when you will contact them and in case of demurrage.

You have to contact the UPS EXPRESS, NIGERIA now for the delivery of your Bank Draft valued at $1,000,000.00 United States Dollars with this information, All you have to do is contact or furnish UPS EXPRESS NIGERIA with your identification for verification of the details there in their office. Send them the following details with their email there as emailing me back will be impossible.

Names in full

Residential Address….

Country…..

Telephone number,….

Contact Person: Mr. Noyin Efe

Email Address : ups.service.ng@[Domain Removed].com

Telephone Number : +234-806-6[Number Removed]

Contact Mr. Noyin Efe there and know when the Draft will get to your address,Let me repeat again, try to contact them as soon as you receive this mail to avoid any further delay and remember to pay them their Security Keeping fee of $999.00 US Dollars Only for their immediate action.You should also let me know through email as soon as you receive your Draft.

Yours Faithfully,

Mrs. Jenny Brown.

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Feb 11 2009
Too Good

Warning from a spammer.

I really like the part where this spammer is warning you of other “impostors.” This spam email has all the elements, a large some of money, foreign intrigue and a legitimate site is mentioned. 

United Nations Assisted Program

Directorate of International Payment 
United Nations Liaison Office – Africa

This email is to notify you about the release of your outstanding payment which is truly $4.7 million. The Federal Government scheduled a time frame to settle all foreign debts which includes Contract/Inheritance/Gambling/Lottery (Sponsored by Microsoft and UK National Lottery) and other international loans. News had it that over the past, numerous individual(s) who happen to be impostors (claiming to be individuals, banks and organizations) are claiming to release numerous sums of fund via numerous ways.

You have two options to receive your payment which is either a Pin Based ATM card or Certified Cashiers Check.

You are advised to select one out of the two options on how you wish to receive your $4.7 million. Your ATM card or Check/Bank Draft will be shipped via FedEx Shipping Company and would get to you within 2 to 3 working days at most.

DO NOT SEND MONEY TO ANYONE UNTIL YOU READ THIS: The actual fees for shipping your ATM card is $96.99 but because Fedex have temporarily discontinued the C.O.D which gives you the chance to pay when package is delivered for international shipping as stated on their website: [Link Removed]  We had to sign contract with them for bulk shipping which makes the fees reduce from the actual $96.99 to $73.95 nothing more and no hidden fees of any sort! 

You are advised to contact the dispatch officer responsible for the shipping of your Check or ATM card with the following information for shipping of your payment Check or ATM card.

Dispatch Officer: Michael Grizla
Email: mikelgrizla@fakedomain.spm
Tel: +234-###-###-5998 or 011-234-###-###-5998

And provide him with the following information:

Your full Name…
Your Address:…………….
Home/Cell Phone:……………….
Preferred Payment Method (Check or ATM):…………….

The dispatch officer will provide you with instructions on how you are to make payment of the $73.95 only for the shipping of your ATM card or Cashiers Check. 

Remember that you are not paying any fees extra no matter what. Once again note that the actual Fedex Retail Price: $96.99 Your Price (Because of our contract signed): $73.95 ($23.04 Savings!).

Yours sincerely,
Mr. Anthony Moore

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